Asking Eric: Is it confusing to call son by middle name for the sake of family tradition?

Dear Eric: This is not an earth-shattering question, yet I’d appreciate an opinion. We call our firstborn son by his middle name because his first is the same as his father’s middle, who also goes by his middle name.

This practice goes back generations on my husband’s father’s side. Imagine my confusion, years ago, when I learned of the tradition and discovered that our as-yet-unconceived son had already been given a first name (but we could choose the middle).

I’ve made my peace with the tradition despite its oddness (personal opinion). Now our son is going on 4, ripe for learning and spelling his entire name and I’m worried he’ll be confused and in turn confuse others when we try to explain that his real first name is actually his daddy’s. I’m already cringing.

I may or may not have noticed your name as an example of an elegant solution, but is it?

— Name Game

Dear Name: Well, the elegance of my nomenclature is up for debate. In high school, when I first started using my first initial, a teacher told me, “Eric, there’s a thin line between class and pretension.” Can you believe that? The audacity still makes me laugh and laugh.

Suffice it to say, your son will have plenty of opportunity to choose class, pretension or something else on his journey of self-expression. If you call him by his middle name, he may eventually choose to use his first. If you call him by his first name, he may choose his middle name. If he becomes a pop star later in life, he may choose a whole new name.

All of those are just fine. But, for now, he’ll be able to understand the concept of a full name and that some parts of the name are used conversationally and others aren’t.

A name is an offering from a parent. And like all the myriad offerings of parenthood, one hopes that it is of use. But even if that use changes, it doesn’t make it less valuable.

(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)