Dear Eric: I’m deaf, gradually lost my hearing and got a cochlear implant in December 1994. I wanted to respond to “Hearing Jokes,” a person with hearing loss whose hearing-impaired siblings staged an intervention because the letter writer didn’t want to get a hearing aid.
I would recommend that “Hearing Jokes” join the Association of Late Deafened Adults (ALDA) and attend some meetings either in person or online. I also recommend joining the Hearing Loss Association of America (HLAA) and attending meetings in person or online. Most of these members (by far the majority) do not identify as deaf but work to find peace of mind first with themselves and then with others.
It is a process to find ways to cope with hearing loss itself and to cope with the feelings of shame and negativity. These people can share their stories with “Hearing Loss” and help the letter writer to find a place of peace within.
— Community and Hope
Dear Community and Hope: Thank you for these great resources. Sometimes friends and loved ones won’t do what they need to do to fix a problem, medical, emotional, psychological, or other. While it’s important to support and sometimes coax them, it’s also crucial to remember that everyone has autonomy. We can’t be forced into doing what’s right for us. What I appreciate about your suggestions is that they offer the letter writer tools to change his or her own mind and to overcome the internal blocks that have impeded addressing the hearing loss in the first place.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)
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