Dear Eric: This is in reference to the letter about giving gifts to adults from “Feeling Bah-humbug” who wrote: “My significant other and I are at the stage in life where we really do not need more ‘stuff’ and would rather not deal with gifts that are generic at best and usually are re-gifted promptly via donation or gift-economy communities.”
We had the same problem. Solved it! Instead of buying gifts, we determined a monetary amount we probably would spend on a gift. We picked $50. Could be any amount.
Every year one person was in charge of collecting the money from everyone. That person donated that amount to their favorite charity. Next year, the next person collected the money and donated it to their favorite charity. Worked great!
—Regifting
Dear regifting: What I love most about this solution, in addition to giving a meaningful pot of money to a charity, is that it gives your family the chance to learn about each other through what causes you care about.
I’d even suggest that the person who is in charge of collecting the money send out a card or letter explaining what the charity does, why that work is personally meaningful, and how the money will impact the work. It’s an added step, but one of the aims of giving and receiving gifts is that it helps us feel closer to those that we love.
Hearing about the good that someone is trying to advance in the world helps us to know them in a deeper way. Thanks for your suggestion. It’s something I’m going to try next year.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)
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