Dear Amy: My husband and I have two children. Our oldest, “Ava,” will be 12 in the fall.
My kids are very close with my parents and, given that we live in the same town, my folks have been very involved in their lives. We love them and feel lucky to have relatively youthful and fun grandparents for our kids – and for us.
Ava recently came home from an overnight visit with my folks and told me that my mother suggested that she should shave her legs.
This issue goes into one area where my mother errs: She has a habit of giving advice about bodies, clothes and grooming. She once cut my daughter’s hair without permission from either of us.
I had to accept this when I was a child, but I don’t like it now.
What do you think I should do?
– Mother
Dear Mother: First, you should talk to your daughter. Emphasize that her body hair belongs to her, and that nobody has the right to tell her what to do with it.
Then you should talk to your mother. Emphasize that “Ava’s” body hair belongs to her, etc.
Rinse and repeat whenever necessary.
Dear Amy: “Cat Lover and Friend” worried that her friend’s cats roamed freely outdoors in an area with predators, and that now one cat was missing.
Mine roam outdoors, and if they become prey, so be it.
Yes, “indoor” cats may live longer, but with being stuck inside all the time – is that really living?
– Cat Lover
Dear Cat Lover: There is a middle ground, where cats can be outside part of the time and brought in at night.
(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
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