Dear Eric: I have been fortunate to have met a number of well-known people and visited many locales worldwide, often, due to my business, places where tourists don’t go.
Occasionally, someone in a group I am with mentions reading about a person or place I know something about from personal experience. If I volunteer that I personally am acquainted with said individual or locale, the response is nearly always negative. The conversation dies, the people walk away.
Apparently, I come across as a “been there, done that” type. I, for one, would be happy to gain firsthand knowledge about a person or place, but apparently most others don’t think that way. My response now is to remain silent and on the periphery of such conversations.
— Lonely Traveler
Dear Traveler: While this isn’t your intention, I fear your input may strike some as bragging. Travel isn’t equally accessible to everyone. Many travelers love to bring back knowledge and stories, but those who missed the boat may not relish these souvenirs.
When you next find yourself in one of these conversations, take the opportunity to ask those gathered what excites or interests them about an individual or locale. Let them talk about their own connection. It may not be informed in the same way as yours, but that doesn’t make it less valuable.
If you do want to share that you have firsthand knowledge, make sure you’re responding to their story. Speak from your own enthusiasm, rather than your expertise. This makes the conversation a group of people talking about the wonders of the world rather than one person seemingly lecturing, even though that’s not your intent.
I sense in you a desire to tell your travel story. That’s also what these people are trying to do. Take advantage of the chance to keep learning about exotic places, even while here at home.
(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)
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