The new Star Wars Oreos are a $5 coin flip to see which type of food coloring you get for your Double Stuf Oreos that are loaded with sugar crystals.
Every box contains either “light side” cookies with blue creme or “dark side” cookies with red creme. It’s a complete mystery which color you will get when you buy a package. Instead, you’re required to “open to discover your destiny.”
Both the light side and dark side taste exactly the same. The only difference is the color.
Is it a dumb marketing scheme? Yes. Did I buy four packs in an effort to get both colors? Also yes.
Apparently, I’m destined for the light side, because the first three boxes I purchased came up blue.
Star Wars Oreos | Review
The cookies themselves are pretty straightforward. They’re Double Stuf Oreos with “kyber” sugar crystals (a surprisingly obscure Star Wars reference).
A quick translation: “Kyber” refers to kyber crystals, which are the power source inside lightsabers. They usually produce blue or green lightsaber blades for Jedi while creating red blades for Sith.
Extra sugar? A random chance to get cookies with blue food coloring? Obscure Star Wars references? This is the sort of thing I dreamt about as a Star Wars-obsessed youth.
Now, I’m a disgruntled adult Star Wars fan who’s fallen way behind on the new shows but still has strong opinions about “Shadows of the Empire.” I’m weary of how much sugar these things have and realize that the mystery colors are a ploy to sell more Oreos.
Even so, part of me was pumped to open up my first box and get the blue cookies. I knew there was still good in me.
What do they taste like?
Despite the elaborate marketing and packaging, Star Wars Oreos are a pretty tame flavor. They’re Double Stuf cookies with crunchy sugar crystals added. Again, the only difference between the “light side” and “dark side” cookies is the color.
The sugar crystals do two things. They jack up the sweetness and add crunchy little bits to the creme.
The sweetness levels are reminiscent of the Mega Stuf Oreo — but with less creme volume between the cookies. It’s delicious. But doesn’t quite hit the same as the more balanced flavor you get in the classic cookies.
As for the texture, it’s fun at first. But after a few bites, it just starts to feel like you’re eating grainy frosting.
So are they any good?
This is a solid cookie, which should not be a shock. It’s still a classic-flavored Oreo at its core.
But the grainy creme filling isn’t as enjoyable as the original version. As a result, it falls to the “very good” tier.
The final word: Updated Oreo rankings
I’m adding this Oreo to my ongoing rankings, which have been in the works since 2014. I’ve got them at No. 33 overall.
As always, these rankings are not scientific, but they are correct:
92. Banana Split Oreo
91. Cookie Dough Oreo
90. Cherry Cola Oreo
89. Berry Oreo
88. Limeade Oreo
87. Apple Pie Oreo
86. Reduced Fat Oreo
85. Oreo Thins Piña Colada
84. Caramel Apple Oreo
83. Key Lime Pie Oreo
82. Fruit Punch Oreo
81. Oreo Thins Pistachio
80. Hot & Spicy Cinnamon Oreo
79. Sour Patch Kids Oreo
78. Gluten Free Golden Oreo
77. Pumpkin Spice Oreo (2014 version)
76. Mystery Oreo (AKA Fruity Crisp)
75. Caramel Coconut Oreo
74. PB&J Oreo
73. Oreo Bites Fudge Dipped Mint Creme
72. Lemon Oreo
71. Oreo Thins Tiramisu
69. Oreo Thins Salted Caramel
68. Oreo Thins Lemon
67. Fudge-Covered Oreo
66. Cookies & Creme Oreo
65. Chocolate Creme Oreo (Golden)
64. Salted Caramel Brownie Oreo
63. Oreo Thins Coconut
62. Snickerdoodle Oreo
61. Peppermint Bark Oreos
60. Peeps Oreo
59. Golden Oreo
58. Oreo Thins (Golden)
57. Golden Double Stuf Oreo
56. Neapolitan Oreo
55. Blueberry Pie Oreo
54. Oreo Thins Extra Stuf
53. Jelly Donut Oreo
52. Kettle Corn Oreo
51. Pumpkin Spice Oreo (2022 Version)
50. Chocolate Hazelnut Oreo
49. Oreo Mini
48. Oreo Bites Fudge Dipped Original
47. Oreo Mini Golden
46. Caramel Mocha Latte Oreo
45. Java Chip Oreo
44. Dunkin’ Donuts Mocha Oreo
43. Peanut Butter Creme Oreo
42. Peanut Butter Cup Oreo
41. Chocolate Peanut Butter Pie
40. Chocolate Creme Oreo
39. Dark Chocolate Oreo
38. Rocky Road Trip Oreo
37. Black & White Cookie Oreo
36. Most Oreo Oreo
35. Mega Stuf Oreo (Vanilla Cookie)
34. Oreo Bites Fudge Dipped Coconut
33. Star Wars Oreo
32. Space Dunk Oreo
31. Gingerbread Oreo
30. Carrot Cake Oreo
29. Cotton Candy Oreo
28. Mint Creme Oreo
27. Most Stuf Oreo
25. Oreo Thins Dark Chocolate
24. Moon Oreos
23. Fireworks Oreo
22. Birthday Cake (Chocolate Cookie) Oreo
21. Triple Double Oreo
20. Maple Syrup Oreo
19. Mystery Oreo (2019 Edition, AKA Churro)
18. Red Velvet Oreo
17. Cinnamon Bun Oreo
16. Oreo Thins (Chocolate)
15. Cookie Butter Oreo
14. Oreo Thins (Mint)
13. Chocolate Marshmallow Oreo
12. Dirt Cake Oreo
11. Blackout Cake Oreo
10. Mega Stuf Oreo
Tied 8. Double Stuf Gluten-Free Oreo
8. Double Stuf Oreo
7. Oreo Thins
Tied-5. Gluten-Free Oreo
5. Oreo
4. Hot Cocoa Oreo
3. Golden Birthday Cake Oreo
2. Marshmallow Krispy Creme Oreo
1. S’mores Oreo
Want more “I Ate It” food coverage? You can follow Nick on Instagram (@NickAteIt) and TikTok (also @NickAteIt)
“I ate it so you don’t have to” is a regular food column looking at off-beat eats, both good and bad. I picked the name years ago and now we’re sort of stuck with it.
You can send any praise/food suggestions to nomalley@masslive.com. Please send all criticisms and questions about Star Wars lore to abass@masslive.com. You can check out the rest of the series here.
