By Steve Pomper
![](https://stirmgroup.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/concealed.jpg)
I just had an experience that refreshed for me those concealed firearms carriers’ special considerations. First, being a legally armed good guy is a good thing. But being armed also means being judicious and restrained.
Police trainers stress prudence and, as I wrote about in these pages, teach cops starting in the academy and throughout their career DT training: every incident is an armed encounter—because the cop has a gun. This is also true for concealed carriers.
That experience I mentioned above happened when I arrived to pick up lunch at one of my favorite teriyaki joints. Entering the restaurant, though quiet at that moment, I immediately sensed from the owner’s and a customer’s demeanor that something wasn’t right. The owner was a small-framed, middle-aged woman, and the customer was a fit male in his early-30s.
I was armed and felt ready to deal with an irate customer drawing a firearm. But what about those intense incidents that may only hint at violence? This guy wasn’t happy with his meal and wanted his money back. But I got one of those cop gut feelings that he might be worse than just a jerk, but, at that moment, he was only being a jerk.
The loud-mouthed jackass was an unhappy customer. However, not only did he want his money back, which was none of my business, but also, he was spewing disgusting, profane comments at her as she chipped back at him—absent the profanity. The more he berated her, the more I wanted to “escort” his butt out of the place.
But I managed to stay above it by allowing my reason to overcome my rile. I wanted so much to toss the thug out on his ass, but he’d stayed just this side of threatening her physically or actually assaulting her (which would have meant game over). She was behind the counter, which provided me with a tactical advantage, since I was standing right next to him.
Still, had I acted while he was only being a jerk, I also had to think about what it would look like for him not to have assaulted or threatened her—or me, and my actions had escalated the incident. What if, God-forbid, the incident somehow rose to deadly force? How would courts these days, especially in the Seattle area, react? Just look at what’s still happening to Marine veteran Daniel Penny in New York City.
Still, if she’d called the police, his abusive language could have amounted to disorderly conduct, or police could have warned him for trespassing and removed him from her store. Or she could have refunded his money sooner. But the woman didn’t seem interested in calling 911, so I held my tongue, listened, and watched. And disorderly conduct and criminal trespassing are not initially lethal force situations. However, instead of leaving right away, I waited until he left the store, which, after she’d refunded his meal, he did.
I still felt terrible because I knew I couldn’t get into it with him, even verbally, concerned about escalation and being armed. He hadn’t been aggressive toward me and had even been annoyingly pleasant, “warning me” about the “poor service.” I hated feeling like I was doing nothing, but, in the end, allowing the verbal nastiness to play out, it worked out except for the jolt to my sense of chivalry. A small price to pay considering the alternatives.
The website everydaycarryconcealed.com advises, “You should never display your firearm for the purposes of intimidation. Doing so is considered ‘brandishing’ and can land you in legal troubles. Additionally, you should never display your firearm to provoke a threat.”
They continue. “Therefore, a good rule of thumb is to never un-holster your gun unless you intend to use it. Furthermore, you should be confident in your ability to prove imminent danger and that other non-violent/non-lethal options were exhausted.”
To clarify, “use it” (your gun) doesn’t necessarily mean firing it. In most cases, as Jacob Sullum at Reason.com informs us, most people deescalate [an] attack from a would-be assailant merely by drawing their guns in self-defense, causing the attacker to retreat.” But, again, be certain you can articulate the “imminent danger” you were facing. This will be different for different people.
Sullum also wrote, “Thirty-one percent of the gun owners said they had used a firearm to defend themselves or their property, often on multiple occasions. As in previous research, the vast majority of such incidents (82 percent) did not involve firing a gun, let alone injuring or killing an attacker.”
To be clear, I hadn’t even considered drawing my weapon without the situation rising to lethal force, but even getting into a physical scrap while armed can inadvertently reveal to the suspect that you are armed. The bad guy could then try to liberate your firearm to use it against you, or your gun could be unintentionally knocked from its holster with the same results.
Sean Holt at USACarry.com gave an example of the overarching considerations of getting into a physical altercation while armed. He wrote about “Nathan,” a concealed carrier watching his stepson’s hockey practice when his wife’s abusive ex, the stepson’s father, tried to provoke Nathan.
Holt wrote, Nathan “has a steady job where he can’t afford to have an assault charge under him. Nathan has a wife and a kid who depend upon him for his income. He has a home that he’d likely have to forfeit to pay for the costly legal fees associated with going to court. And last, but certainly not least, he always carries a gun on him.”
Nathan’s antagonist was described as “a lanky, unemployed, balding 6’5” dude with mental issues. In other words, the jerk has nothing to lose, while Nathan could lose everything.”
Holt continued, “Nathan told me over a few beers in his garage that he wished with all his might he could have knocked the teeth out of that guy. Instead, he just stood his ground and brushed off the comment. He had to be the bigger man. More importantly, when his wife and her kid finished hockey practice, he had to get them out of there.”
Remember, these days, cops who’ve acted properly even on duty, are sitting in court or, even worse, in prison, for doing their jobs. No one is immune from the gun-stupid gun-haters in today’s criminal injustice system. We’ve written about many of them here at the NPA and have done our best to help keep them out of prison.
As an experienced and capable retired cop, if you’ve ever wondered about what true strength is, think about what it takes to avoid a physical confrontation with some twitchy scumbag rather than introducing his face to the floor.
Resisting the impulse to thump a jerk is hard; surrendering to the thumping is easy. The latter may feel better in the moment. But, if you’re sitting in court, facing months in jail or years in prison, losing your job, living with a conviction, missing all of your kid’s hockey games, and everything else, while your wife’s ex remains free, how good would that feel?
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